Intern year...not quite over

Frick-a-frack!

It's my last free weekend until at least the end of June and I get called in to cover for someone who's sick.

This intern I'm covering for has a so-called gastrointestinal bug. Conveniently, he happened to have the day off today, too. Is this a three day weekend that he's calling in "sick" for? I like to think the best of people, but I've got a weird feeling about this one...

And it's not just for tomorrow. No. It's an overnight shift. 30 hours. There goes my beautiful, relaxing final weekend at home with Sam. Kyle's out of town. Thank God for Beth and Steve-- Sam will be enjoying his first sleep-over sans parents.

Grrrr... sometimes I hate being in a profession with such responsibilities....

Crawling to Seattle

Spent my only week off this year (aside from the 6 weeks I got for maternity leave) visiting family in MA for Diana's bridal shower and then looking for a place to live in Seattle.  The weekend in MA was lovely; I always enjoy seeing the family with Sam and he was able to meet his two cousins, Ethan and Gavin.

The trip to Seattle was a bit daunting. It started with the 5+ hour plane ride from Boston to Seattle that I inexplicably scheduled during the time that both Sam and I sleep.  It was exhausting but Sam weathered it like the Champ he is; at the rent car counter at midnight he was babbling and smiling and I wondered, "How is it that my child is comforting me here?"

The next few days, Kyle and I tried to catch up on sleep and also explored the city. Several times, I found myself thinking, "What the heck have I done? I'm moving my whole family across the country where we have to start everything new." The sound of my inner voice was familiar-- it's the same one I've heard on the rare occasion when I'm exceptionally tired at work. It has a tendency to say negative things and to assume that things are harder than normal. I told myself my lack of sleep was making everything worse than it was. Then Kyle told me not to shoulder the burden of this move, that it was a family decision, thought out by both of us. He reminded me that we were in it together and he was excited to move to Seattle. How I love him...

As the week went on, everyone adjusted to the time zone and I felt more confident. On our last day, we walked Sam in the Washington Park Arboretum (coffees in hand, of course) in Montlake, enjoyed treats in a gluten-free, vegan, sugar-alternative bakery (Heaven!), and saw the awesome sky-line from Gas Works Park in Fremont. I started imaging how great things will be once we're there, established in our own space.  I guess I like the security of routine and home comforts and this is only more so with an infant in tow.

Sam did great. He made friends with a large lab named Amos and continued to piece together his forward motion. In Seattle, we witnessed him make a few sequential crawling motions and when we returned to Atlanta, he showed us a full-on, across-the-room, crawl. I thought about how patient and determined he is and realized it's a good metaphor for the upcoming move: take it one small step at a time.

Here's some pics from the visit home:

Ethan, Sam, and Gavin

With Dad

Toes are the best!

A Seattle park from Sam's perspective:

At the Gas Works Park in Fremont looking south to downtown:

The "Whole Fam-Damnly"

Seattle Skyline

Whoa, look at that crawling!

This new mobility means Sam is discovering new things everyday:

The 6th Month

Sam is nearly 6 months old. 

He continues to roll easily from back to front (less so from front to back), tripod, and is newly on all fours. He can inch-worm himself backwards, but has yet to develop any forward momentum. He's adept at turning 360 on his belly; we find him in many positions in his crib during the night. 

He grasps small items like blocks in his hand and everything is thoroughly inspected with his mouth. He's in the 4-6 month outgoing phase in which he is curious, happy, and easily delighted.  He clearly recognizes immediate family members and is initially shy around strangers.

He continues to experiment with sound combinations including broadening his dolphin-like squeals. He discovered how to splash in the bathtub last night and started eating rice cereal this week. His upper incisors and lateral incisors have appeared, for a new total of 6 teeth!

Best of all, he's been sleeping a solid 11 hrs per night for the last 3 weeks. We shifted to letting him cry a little before sleep and now he rarely protests. 

Easily portable:

Laughing:

Tummy time and grasping and pulling:

On all fours:

First Solid Food:

Uh-Oh!

Check out the Samurai* in action! He's learning to tripod (an early step to sitting).

And he was ok, by the way!

*It only took Dad 4 months to nickname Sam!

In like Sam the Lion!

Whew, that was a tough month. But we knew it would be. Sara summed it up pretty well in her recent post. Unfortunately, it's the first of two hard months. March will have a pretty similar theme (Sara on a hard rotation, me coaching). April should be easier with Sara on elective and then my coaching season ends on May 1st. Right now, Sara and I aren't scheduled for a day off together in the month of March.

At some later point I should probably post about coaching and why it's important. I'm sure a lot of folks I know wonder why I choose to add that additional burden on to us. That's a pretty long post though. For now, please enjoy the pictures and video!

Sam has been discovering the cats and becoming more interested in them. They are also getting closer to him. Here's a video of Sam interacting with DJ Mayhem (May). This interaction has escalated over several days until May decided that she needed to set some boundaries yesterday. Luckily, no one was injured.

Sam helped me pick up pinestraw yesterday (part of staging the house for sale):

Sam was wearing a lion outfit yesterday and so he was doing his best lion impression on this elephant:

And here's Sam doing what he does best, practicing to be cute:

A Day in the Life

If you've noticed, dear reader, that I haven't posted in over a month it's because my schedule has been crazy since February started. I was so busy, I hardly even realized that my birthday had come and gone (alas, there was no 29th anyway...) I was on general medicine wards at Grady with only 4 days off for the entire month and 30 hours shifts every 8 days. That schedule is generally not so bad, certainly compared to others, but with having to wake up 1-2 times a night to feed Sam, the sleep deprivation added up.

Today's my first day off in 12 days and with a couple extra hours of sleep this morning, I almost feel anew...

I get a lot of questions about how I manage internship with having a baby at home. The answer always boils down to having amazing family support (the "it-takes-a-village" approach, i.e. what would we do without Beth and Steve??) and not trying to be super-mom. There are compromises involved on both sides, but when in balance, I feel lucky to be both a doctor and a mom. It's like having your cake and eating it, too.

Even before I had Sam, it always seemed to be difficult to get out the door at the right time. When I was pregnant, I had a hard time imaging what daily life would look like once a baby was in the picture. The answer seems to be to allow enough time for things to come up, and to be flexible about the order in which you do things... and keep a detailed calendar plastered to the refrigerator.

...and learn to function on less sleep...

Here's how it works on a typical day:
5:30-5:545  wake up
5:45-6:30  shower, pump while eating breakfast (or nurse if the timing works out), pack food, leave house
6:15 Kyle wakes up Sam, packs up the milk and drives him to Beth and Steve's house. Steve now goes into work a little later to cover Sam in the early morning while Beth gets her daily walk and yoga routine in.
7:00 Sara and Kyle both arrive at work
7:00-12:00 Various medical duties
11:30-1:00 Run to a call room to pump, eat lunch at lecture
1:00-6:00 More medical duties and +/- get to pump for the 3rd time that day
3:30-6:00 Kyle leaves work and coaches the Paideia girls' Ultimate team
5:00-8:00 I leave work and pick Sam up. Depending on the day, this time varies. Usually 15-30 min to get to Beth and Steve's house. Spend 15-30 min with them, recapping the day, +/- pumping if Sam just ate and I didn't get to do it earlier in the afternoon. Then 20-30 min back home. Sometimes takes me 90-120 min to get from work back to home.
6:00-8:00 Depending on the time, I may prepare dinner/heat up leftovers/call Kyle for take-out. Sam may or may not get a bath depending on how sleepy he is/how late I got him home. I nurse him and he's usually asleep by 730/8.
8:00-9:30 Eat dinner, organize my plan for patients for the following day/ read part of an article, or watch a little tv. Drink some wine.
9:00-10:00 Pump one last time, go to bed
3:30 Sam usually wakes up around now. Kyle changes him and brings him back to bed so I can nurse him.
4:30 I wake up realizing Sam's done nursing and has been asleep next to me for who-knows how long, so I get up and put him back in his crib. On a rough night, we do this twice, but most of the time, just once.
5:30-5:45 wake up and do it all over again

I feel tired just reading over this schedule! It certainly isn't sustainable, but it's do-able for the time being. Luckily, each month my rotation and schedule changes (April's looking good!) and Kyle's particularly busy Feb-May balancing work and coaching. Sometimes I worry that we're packing in too much; is it irresponsible of us to be trying to parent at the same time? How about the days when I only see Sam for 5 min in the morning and 30 min at night? Or the nights I'm on call and don't see him for 30+ hours?


I have to remind myself that I'm investing in my future career, a livelihood for my family. I'd rather be busy now when Sam doesn't realize that I'm away than when he's older. I also take comfort knowing that we are a true multi-generational household. When I arrive to pick him up and find Steve playing peek-a-boo or Beth rocking him to meditation chant music, I realize that I'm the only one who's stressed about being away from Sam. He, on the other hand, is thriving and adapting to the diversity of care he's receiving from all of us.

Thanks to Abba and Chief for all of your love and support!

Week 16! Big Times

So, February brings madness. Sara started a medicine rotation on Tuesday and I start coaching tomorrow. Sara's month started with overnight call on Tuesday and she has been working all day today (Sunday) so I've gotten my small taste of single fatherhood (and cannot wait for Sara to get home).

Sam purportedly got some back to front rolls in at Abba's house this week. He's had 5(while I was writing this he nailed his 6th! and is now working on his 7th) here today. Below is the end of the 4th roll (yes, he's cheating a little using the mirror but a few of them were without any outside assistance. The funny part is that he's not a big fan of being on his belly - so he gets over and then starts grunting.

He's also be dealing with his first tooth coming in. His left front bottom incisor is showing through his gums. He was a bit fussy on yesterday and Friday but has been in a pretty good mood today, just super drooly.